There Were No Signs

Steven Outram

There Were No Signs

By walking I found out
Where I was going.

By intensely hating, how to love.
By loving, whom and what to love.

By grieving, how to laugh from the belly.
Out of infirmity, I have built strength.

Out of untruth, truth.
From hypocrisy, I wove directness.

Almost now I know who I am.
Almost I have the boldness to be that man.

Another step

And I shall be where I started from.

Irving Layton

“I carried with me poems.” (Remember that one by Gail Dusenbery? I posted it way back in March 2017.) Well, this poem I have carried with me from my teen years to today. I love everything about it. The title alone is full of layers and possibilities.  I read it now, and think of the person I used to be, the people I've met, the things that have happened, and the words feel more true than ever. We can’t prepare ourselves for the things we will face in life. I was not prepared! When I first came across the line, “By walking I found out/Where I was going.” it was a comfort.  To hear Layton say that knowing comes from experiencing, from living, from doing, helped me. Knowing that it is the going through that is the making of us is a relief. I don't have to know everything or anticipate every circumstance. Life will take me where it will, and growth will come as I go along.